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Stories and Jokes

 
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Eisen
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Joined: 29 Mar 2005
Posts: 1925

PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2006 6:54 pm    Post subject: Stories and Jokes Reply with quote

This is a thread for funny stories and jokes (obviously) that are found online or if you feel like sharing past personal events. Put up links or jus copy and paste them onto here. As for my story I found a livejournal full of some hilarious stories.

http://grumpywookie.livejournal.com/

My favorite is the mouse one (third story)
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Madhatte
Brigadier Survivor
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Joined: 25 Mar 2005
Posts: 7948
Location: Olympia, WA

PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2006 8:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Note his most recent post:

Grumpywookie wrote:
Folks, I'm off on a six month deployment with the US Navy.

So I'll see you in August.

I should gather some good stories.

In the mean time, adieu.


That hits a bit close to home, methinks.
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We live in an amazing, amazing world, and it's wasted on the crappiest generation of spoiled idiots. -- Louis CK

We are going to have to stick a pin in a map, set fire to something and carry on until the earth looks flat! -- RandyMac

I could teach you to how file a washer to make it worth a nickel but if you really want to make big bucks just take a penny and drill a hole in it and it becomes a washer and is worth a dime. -- Art Martin, Old-Time Logger
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Haven
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Joined: 26 Mar 2005
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Location: Virginia Beach, North America

PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2006 11:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

He's likely Enterprise, then. That's about when they left... well, or E's battlegroup.
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Mongolio
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Joined: 25 Mar 2005
Posts: 4976

PostPosted: Sat Jul 08, 2006 3:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Damn, that was funny! Sounds like their boot camp buildings were the same as ours...

Shame there's only one page.
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Core meltdown (commonly known as a meltdown) is an accident scenario in nuclear reactors, and is one of the possible modes of failure for light water reactors, during which the reactor pile turns into a pile of reactor.
---RationalWiki

If Jesus had existed, his DNA would have been 99% similar to that of a chimpanzee. Or you. You're 99% Jesus.
-- RationalWiki
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Eisen
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Joined: 29 Mar 2005
Posts: 1925

PostPosted: Wed Jul 12, 2006 8:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

As you are receiving e-mail, it's wise to remember how easily this wonderful technology can be misused, sometimes unintentionally and with serious consequences.

Consider the case of the Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.

Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before.

When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint. Hearing the scream, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

"Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

P.S. Sure is hot down here!"
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Glistam
I plead the Third
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Joined: 24 Mar 2005
Posts: 5075

PostPosted: Thu Jul 13, 2006 2:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/hot.htm
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"I don't have dreams about the Navy. The Navy killed all of my dreams." - Buddy Lee

What I've been doing.
What I'm also doing.
What I wish I did more of.
What I've done.
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Trassin
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Joined: 30 Mar 2005
Posts: 10148
Location: Malabo, Equatorial Guinea

PostPosted: Mon May 27, 2013 9:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6s-M6hfk9Ro
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The word God is for me nothing more than the expression and product of human weaknesses, the Bible a collection of honorable, but still primitive legends which are nevertheless pretty childish. - Albert Einstein
"Raccoons oscillate at 50Hz in Europe." - FAWBOTS
"I'm not sure I'm up for orgy scrabble parties" - Female Friend
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Mongolio
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Joined: 25 Mar 2005
Posts: 4976

PostPosted: Tue May 28, 2013 2:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow. 7 year thread resurrection. Impressive. Most impressive. Now I'll watch the video.

Vid watched.

It's almost like you tied in the 7 years with 7 days or something. Or maybe just your mom.
_________________
Core meltdown (commonly known as a meltdown) is an accident scenario in nuclear reactors, and is one of the possible modes of failure for light water reactors, during which the reactor pile turns into a pile of reactor.
---RationalWiki

If Jesus had existed, his DNA would have been 99% similar to that of a chimpanzee. Or you. You're 99% Jesus.
-- RationalWiki
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Madhatte
Brigadier Survivor
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Joined: 25 Mar 2005
Posts: 7948
Location: Olympia, WA

PostPosted: Wed May 29, 2013 6:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

All of your moms.
_________________
We live in an amazing, amazing world, and it's wasted on the crappiest generation of spoiled idiots. -- Louis CK

We are going to have to stick a pin in a map, set fire to something and carry on until the earth looks flat! -- RandyMac

I could teach you to how file a washer to make it worth a nickel but if you really want to make big bucks just take a penny and drill a hole in it and it becomes a washer and is worth a dime. -- Art Martin, Old-Time Logger
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Eisen
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Joined: 29 Mar 2005
Posts: 1925

PostPosted: Wed May 29, 2013 7:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Seven years since FFXI, huh? ... Damn...
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