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The dumbest thing I heard this week
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Haven
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 9:07 am    Post subject: The dumbest thing I heard this week Reply with quote

Overheard at the NEX:

Mother:"Hey, remember that movie, Faranheit 911?"
Teen daughter:"Yeah?"
Mother:"This movie's 'Faranheit 451', whatever that's supposed to mean..."


I almost broke down and cried, I tell ya.
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Immyls
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 9:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

wow.  more reasons to avoid the nex...  now if only i lived somewhere where i could afford to...
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Mongolio
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 10:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don't get it.

Was there a 911 and a 451 movie?  

<lives under a rock>
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Core meltdown (commonly known as a meltdown) is an accident scenario in nuclear reactors, and is one of the possible modes of failure for light water reactors, during which the reactor pile turns into a pile of reactor.
---RationalWiki

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Haven
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 10:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

451- Famous 'big brother' type book by Ray Bradbury, been around for a billion years, alternates between (ironically) banned and required reading status.

911- Movie by fat schmuck Michael Moore about retarded evil schmuck George W. Bush. Been around for about 1 year.
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Mongolio
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 10:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ok.

Guess I still fail to see the humor.
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Core meltdown (commonly known as a meltdown) is an accident scenario in nuclear reactors, and is one of the possible modes of failure for light water reactors, during which the reactor pile turns into a pile of reactor.
---RationalWiki

If Jesus had existed, his DNA would have been 99% similar to that of a chimpanzee. Or you. You're 99% Jesus.
-- RationalWiki
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Madhatte
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 10:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I thought it was funny.
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Izane Bricks
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 12:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I loled
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Yobun
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 12:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

very funny. it's 451 because that is the temp that paper catchs on fire. it's a classic book many have to read in grade school or highschool, and just about everyone knows of it, and the Moores movie was a play on the title and meaning applied to 911

Last edited by Yobun on Tue May 24, 2005 12:56 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Glistam
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 12:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The humor wasn't lost on me.
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Yobun
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 12:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i got one that is more funny than sad:
ryrra had to go to the hospital for some stuff and we were in a room with an older man seperated by a curtain, so we could hear the doctor talking to him. one of the questions the doctor asked was "Have you eaten anything funny recently" the man said "What?" but in the tone like "How could i eat food that is funny" and the doctor had to elaborate on it for him.
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Trow
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PostPosted: Tue May 24, 2005 2:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

reminds me of the time the wife and i got in car accident in New Orleans, had to sit in a waiting room with a guy in handcuffs that tryed to kill himself with a plastic fork
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Mhuirnin
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PostPosted: Wed May 25, 2005 7:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I was with my brother in the mall once a few years back, I think at Babbage's or Radio Shack, or some other game/electronics store, when an elderly man approached him...

Old Man: "Hey, could you help me out with something?"
Verence: "Uh, sure. What do you need?"
OM: "I'm looking for a computer with a kajiggawatt of memory."
V: "A... What? Do you mean a gigabyte?"
OM: "No, son, don't you know what a kajiggawatt is?!"
V: "Actually, I'm pretty sure those don't exist."
OM throws up his hands and walks off, muttering: "And young people are supposed to know everything about computers nowadays!"
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Mongolio
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PostPosted: Wed May 25, 2005 8:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Doc Brown wrote:
1.21 kajiggawatts!

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Core meltdown (commonly known as a meltdown) is an accident scenario in nuclear reactors, and is one of the possible modes of failure for light water reactors, during which the reactor pile turns into a pile of reactor.
---RationalWiki

If Jesus had existed, his DNA would have been 99% similar to that of a chimpanzee. Or you. You're 99% Jesus.
-- RationalWiki
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stinkybrokenut
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PostPosted: Wed May 25, 2005 7:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

When I was working at Pep Boys in my pre-Navy days, I answered a call and the man on the other end of line asked "Does yous guyz have a calculator-back exhaust system for a 1987 Chevy Caprice."  I kindly reminded the gentleman that he was prolly lookin for a catilytic-converter back exhaust and no we didn't have it and as soon as got off the phone I just lost it.  How could you not?
Another gentleman on the phone was lookin for a starter for a chevy van but he didn't know the engine size.  So I told him to look at his registration and look at the eighth digit in to get the engine code so I could help him.  And he goes "The eighth digit from the left or the right?"  I kindly remind him that usually English is read from left to right and of course as soon as I got off the phone I lost it again with my friends behind the parts counter.  I'll admit you had to be there.  I swear when you're dealin with customers (and with cars especially) you have to laugh.
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Last edited by stinkybrokenut on Thu May 26, 2005 7:03 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Lotan
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PostPosted: Thu May 26, 2005 5:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I was buying tickets for a comedy show once.  I knew my sister was going to be getting tickets later on in the day but I didn't want the show to sell out.

Me: Do you know how many tickets do you have left for the show?
Rep: Enough for you to buy some.

Later on... while giving my credit card number

Rep: Expiration date?
Me:  May 2005
Rep: So is that like 04?
Me:  May?  That's the fifth month.

On a side note I used to know a guy who always pronounced giga - jiga.  So his computer was 2.4 jigahertz with a jigabyte of RAM.

Ana
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Trow
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PostPosted: Thu May 26, 2005 6:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

watched a guy try to pet and get bit by a dog in thailand and have to get rabies shots 20 minutes after we had a "theres a lot of wild dogs, they have rabies, DONT TOUCH" breifing. flight doc told um he was either fine or had 4 days to live

cliff diving drunk 200 miles from the nearest hospital in australia...... guess who had to be the one to slip and tumble down 15 feet of jaged rocks, good thing i got a cast iron head
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Trassin
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 10:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Had a truck driver, who is between 30 and 40 years old, standing behind me as I tried to explain how to access a secure part of my company's web site.

Truck Driver: Wait, how did you do that? (All that I had done at this point was open up the web browser to the home page)
Truck Driver: Wait, how did you do that? (I clicked on a link to get to the secure page I needed. He wasn't wondering what link I had clicked on but why the page had changed to something different when I clicked.)

At this point I just sort of hung my head and tried to decide if I wanted to laugh or cry.

I still continued on and tried to explain how to do what he needed. It all ended with about the most confused look I've ever seen on another human being, sort of like how my dog tilts his head to the side and looks at the speakers in my car whenever I play Mars Volta's Telavators.

As a side note this same guy was going to get fired because he couldn't pass the online training exams. Of course part of the reason he couldn't pass them was because he never bothered to ask if there was actual training material he was supposed to be looking at and was just getting people to log into the tests for him (couldn't do it himself) and taking them.

While not all truck drivers are dumb, the dumb ones are very, very dumb.
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Mishlai
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 1:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I used to get bored in A school and walk to the Radio shack to shop for "3-phase induction batteries."

Coincidentally, they were always out of stock. "But we just had some, I saw them the other day. They were right over in this area. Check back next week."

Can do.
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Resheph
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 7:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I went to a private school, so I have heard some mind-blowingly stupid shit.

In health class one day the teacher goes around the room asking people what their favorite color was, as it is usually because it reminds you of something else. A kid says "My favorite color is red or orange, it reminds me of the fall, and I love the smell of wood burning stoves in the fall" and the girl next to me leans to her friend and says "They make stoves outta wood? Wouldn't they burn?!"......
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CrushFearSynth
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 08, 2006 7:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I was talking to my nephew on the phone a few months ago, and I had a superb brain fart experience. He told me that someone was stealing newspaper vending machines in his area, and I replied "Why would anyone want to steal newspapers?".
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